I Forgive You

 These are the words that were sent to my dad and possibly to his youngest brother, by their middle brother (after the oldest was tragically killed in a train accident when the engineer gave the oldest of four permission to ride in the engine car and the train met another train with loose lumber which flew through the windshield and pierced the oldest in the neck and killed him). The middle brother had been estranged by his two brothers for his homosexual lifestyle (I was the closer to him than my brother and I never saw him display this after his relationship with the one man he introduced to our family ended). In their defense, he told me in an email much later that he was also a participant in that separation.

I guess sometime before I received that email, the middle brother sent a card: "I forgive you." The older brother was unaware of what he had done and unfortunately didn't write a letter back to his brother, but then again, it's probably just as well. As my grandmother used to say, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."

After the middle brother passed away a few years ago (you can read his obituary presumably written by his youngest brother, here), there was much drama between the youngest brother and the friends of the middle brother who was now deceased, and I got caught in the middle. Actually, there has been some drama between the youngest brother and I over theological disagreements. Had I to do it over again, I would not have made any contact with the deceased brother's friends because that just made everything worse. In the end, my relationship with the youngest, which was somewhat on the mends, was terminated per his request.

I thought much about the books of Leland's that were suspended from being purchasable at Amazon.com. I've beat myself up for that because I made it easier for that to be done by having the deceased person's phone sent to his younger brother rather than to me, as I was abroad in South Korea, where I still am today. Little did I know that he would use the passwords he had access to, to delete as much of the deceased brother's intellectual property as possible. 

That bothered me for months, possibly a year or more. Then I went to church one day and as I was praying in the chair (They don't have pews at this church), I heard a voice (If you know me, you know I don't put much stock in claims to hearing God's voice but I truly believe this was the Holy Spirit talking to me, not in an audible voice, of course) tell me: "Forgive him."

And like that, the burden and anger I had felt for so many months, was gone. Of course there is the hurt from the broken relationship that lingers and I am sure it always will. For anybody who believes in separating from their family, I urge you to think twice about it because you have no idea how hurtful it is. It hinders a person in many areas. But we must move forward anyway, right?

I came to find out in a conversation with my brother that even when God empowers us to forgive, it is not so simple as one simple prayer or even releasing that pain. 

As you will read in the obituary, while Leland was hurt by what his brothers did to him, his brothers were also hurt by the lifestyle he chose (I've seen many lines recently from movies where they say, "We always have a choice."), even though he maintained it wasn't a choice. Inevitably, we choose, one way or another, whether it's due to our sexual orientation or whatever (In my humble opinion which, as you may know, is not always so humble).

So as I seek to forgive and keep forgiving the last living uncle on my father's side who chooses not to have a relationship with me, I am reminded that I have also done things to bring this on and I own those statements, attitudes and actions, and I hope and pray that just as it happens in my dreams, we will someday be able to talk face to face and that the heartache that we both feel will be resolved before something bad happens to either one of us.

I forgive you. Can you forgive me?

A Preacher Re-Discovered

 Here is a post about a preacher that I re-discovered. Actually, he's famous for his books. I've never been a die-hard fan of his books. But for some reason, he came to mind and so I searched for him on YouTube and found this sermon. The preacher's name is Max Lucado. 

I like him for three reasons. (1) He focuses on one text. I get annoyed and distracted by preachers who bring in multiple passages that they think relate but I often fail to see the connection. (2) He speaks simply. This is something I'm having to re-learn and have not yet figured out yet. I thought after learning all of those seventy-five dollar words in Bible school, college and seminary, that I had to use them. But even for me, hearing a sermon that is simple but rich in content is the best. (3) There are illustrations but they are not unrelated to one another. They have a common theme and they reinforce the point that is made (Yes, I do mean point, for any good sermon only has 1 point).

Check out this sermon and tell me what you think. Just so you know, I'm not getting any kickbacks from recommending this link. I'm just sharing something I received grace from, and if my experience is true at all, it probably won't mean the same thing to others as it did to me in exactly the same way.

Rethinking Heaven: A Review of "The Magician's Nephew" by CS Lewis

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On the way home tonight from Seoul, I finally finished reading, "The Magician's Nephew" by C.S. Lewis. This is the first in "The Chronicles of Narnia" series. Although I would like to write a more in-depth review, I'm going to focus on the books impact on me.

Why am I reading this? I have nothing better to do with my time. Well, I don't know how to respond to that but that's probably not the real reason (and not at all true by the way, even though this is my last week of vacation before the new semester begins). Actually, I started reading this to encourage my son to read it. But then I realized this is good reading for me.

I'm actually on a quest to fill in the holes that are left from my theological education. NT Wright is helping me in tremendous ways and I think C.S. Lewis is complementing Wright. Actually, this book, especially in the second half, made me think more about Heaven. I have probably more recently become complacent about my thinking of Heaven because of the pre-tribulational rapture position that we will be taken out of this world. But C.S. Lewis had a way of reimagining it. Now, I'm not totally sure whether C.S. Lewis was trying to portray Heaven or the Garden of Eden through this book but it struck me as exciting to think of Heaven as a dynamic place like Narnia, a place accessible in this life (although obviously it's not really meant for humans living on earth to access it through magic rings). 

I'm sure things will become much clearer as I continue to read, which I plan to do, and hope to offer a more in-depth review, also looking at those of more fundamentalist and/or progressive backgrounds and their critique(s) on this series.

For now, here are the main characters. Aslan the Lion (Whom I think represents Christ but I'll have to read more), Digory, the nephew of the Magician, Andrew, Polly, Digory's neighbor whom he becomes friends with. There are many more characters who are more developed as the series goes on. One of the interesting things that continue in "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe," is that the "Wardrobe" is the closet that the characters have to enter in order to go to Narnia. More about that is yet to come.

The Grass is Greener on the Other Side: A Review of "Freckle Juice" by Judy Blume

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 I picked up "Freckle Juice" by Judy Blume up at Bora Public Library recently. It's funny. As I read this short book (less than 100 pages) I found myself envisioning my second or third grade when I attended Shawsheen Elementary School in Greeley, Colorado, and then when I was googling the Freckle Juice movie, I saw that this is about the second grade. So I thought that was something. 

So what's the story about? Spoiler alert! It's about a boy named Andrew who wants to have freckles (What is it about wanting to have what we can't and not wanting what we have?). He envies a boy in his class who has freckles, apparently because then nobody would know whether or not he has washed his face and neck. So a girl in his class gives him a "magic potion" that will give him freckles. But all it does is make him sick. His mom thought that his appendix had ruptured. He stayed home the next day and the day after that, he gave himself freckles with a magic marker. 

Then his teacher, Miss Kelly, came to the rescue and gave him a "magic" freckle-remover kit. He went into the bathroom and removed his so-called "freckles."

The moral of the story: Accept yourself for who you are. If you don't have freckles, be glad you don't. If you have freckles, be glad you do because that's who you are.

If you're looking to check off reading a book, this is an easy one. I would guess an adult could read this whole book in an hour or less in one sitting, though I read it over several days. And now I can check it off the list and am now one book closer to catching up to my son.

By the way, if you're looking for a good library with quality children's books in English, I highly recommend Bora Public Library. By the way, I'm not getting any kickbacks in telling you that.

Robbed

Photo: Pixabay

Artist: Lilly Cantabile

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I resumed reading the KJV (King James Version) Bible backwards today. You can buy your favorite Pure Cambridge Text Bible here. I've read the NT from Revelation to Matthew, respectively, so today I started Malachi in the Old Testament. It's the last book of the Old Testament. And it's probably a book that gets less treatment behind the Bible, especially in churches where the preacher chooses the text each week.

I have two recollections of preachers who preached from this book. One was the pastor I grew up, The Reverend Dr. Jim Christy, at Sunny View Church of the Nazarene, now Celebration Pointe Church at a different location. Unfortunately, I don't remember the content of his sermon. I do remember he was preaching through the Bible, one book at a time, each Sunday.

The second was from the Reverend Dr. Stephen Borger at Nampa First Church of the Nazarene. I remember that he referred to a previous sermon when he preached from Malachi which is encouraging. But he was kind of vague in saying that the Church had been robbed throughout his sermon and people thought that someone literally stole money from the church. By the end of the sermon, everybody was so upset, trying to figure out which evil person could have stolen money from the church. I believe the church must have gotten so many phone calls that the pastor clarified the following week what had happened. People steal from God by not giving their money to him. 

I think, though, that sometimes people give to churches, thinking they are giving to God, but that the money is actually "stolen" in the sense that it isn't used for what the giver intended. It's not quite the same nuance but how many have given to alternate organizations because they didn't trust that the Church was going to use the money for purposes that truly build God's kingdom. I have thought for some time now about giving to Nazarene Compassionate Ministries for some time now because I know that 100% of donations go to help those in need and not to pay salaries of staff who work there. There are many such organizations. 

Before I digress into a debate about where the best places are to donate money, or more accurately, to pay offering (tithe is an Old Testament concept, which also seems appropriate in this context, although some would argue, rightly so, that 10% is actually a pretty small amount), let me suggest some other things that stick out. Keep in mind, I'm referring to the text in the KJV and I am not a KJV only, it's just a challenge that one of my uncle's gave me a few years ago, which I intend to complete (although he doesn't endorse my reading the Bible backwards).

The first thing I noticed, which is the last thing in the book, are these words in all caps: "THE END OF THE PROPHETS." This is a key point for those who claim to be prophets today, you might want to rethink what you're saying by calling yourselves prophets.

When I read Malachi, I see more than just withholding money from God. I read a refreshing thing, that God isn't satisfied by our going to church in and of itself. In fact, God was not accepting the offerings of the people in Malachi. There's a reason for that and we also ought to consider whether God really accepts our offerings if we are just "Sunday" Christians or just "Church Christians" meaning we act like Christians at church but God's Spirit doesn't really move in us when we are at home, in the neighborhood, or at work. And think about that, how hard it is to get along with family and how that might be the real test of whether or not we are really God's people.

But that's not "the rest of the story" as Paul Harvey used to say. At the end of the book, there is a promise that God "will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the LORD. And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse" (Malachi 4:5-6, KJV). One who is familiar with the gospels will recall that some thought Jesus was Elijah. We have to wonder if the gospel writers, not to mention the witnesses of Jesus, were thinking of this verse, and also what the writer of Malachi had in mind of speaking of this future Elijah.

"Insignificant Events in the Life of a Cactus" A Book Review

 

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Last time I went to the library, I did a couple of searches on recommendations of chapter books for fourth-graders, since my son is in the fourth grade. Unfortunately, many books on the list from Read Aloud America are not available in the city I live in here in South Korea. But I found "Insignificant Events in the Life of a Cactus" at one library here in Yongin-City, Kyeonggi Province, South Korea, at Bora Public Library. This library is distinct among libraries in Yongin and this is one way in which it is unique. Even in Korean, only Bora Public Library has this book. I may utilize it to study Korean as well.

What can I say about this book without giving the whole story away? Well, it is a moving book about a girl named "Aven" who has no arms. She was born that way. She was adopted by two of the coolest parents who love her and think of her not as their adopted daughter but as their real daughter. 

Her life is comfortable in Kansas but as a result of her dad getting a job as a theme park manager in Arizona, the whole family "gets to" move to Arizona. But when they get there, there are a whole lot of surprises. I won't spoil it by telling you what those surprises are.

While Aven has no arms, she is a truly remarkable person. You who have known people with disabilities who lived exemplary lives know what I'm talking about. And she becomes friends with two others, one of which also has a disability of sorts and the other is self-conscious about being overweight. But these three become three in a pod.

As I told you, I borrowed this book for my son but I am 46 years and I absolutely loved it. In fact, I wish I had read a book like this when I was in the fourth grade and had a hard time making friends. This book is a must read for anyone, big or small. 

I'll warn you now, once you pick it up you won't want to put it down and don't be surprised if you shed a tear at some point, especially at the end when Aven does the remarkable on stage.

If you're wondering what age this book is appropriate, according to Common Sense Media, this book is appropriate for children age 9 and above. 

Don't want to go to the library but just want to read it from home. Just click here and you can buy it directly from Amazon. 

Checking In

 I haven't written in a while. I've found enjoyment in listening to the Bible via audio recently. I've listened to the rest of the New Testament (Matthew, though I never wrote about it here). I've been listening to the "Book of Common Prayer" via the Bible app. I've also been thinking about Bible Baptist of Belzview and how cool it would be if they had an audio version. I doubt it would be that hard to set up. I'd ask them myself but we're currently not on the best of terms.

Why we're not on the best of terms goes way back but recently it's related to my Uncle Leland Dirks who passed away in February. There was a lot involved with it. If you want to get a snippet, you can start by reading his obituary here. He was gay and I guess you could say his brothers never really got over that. It's really a sad story that goes back a long way to when my uncle told my grandma, his mom, about it. She never told me about it but I'm sure her youngest who lived with her for many years heard and saw the pain. 

So, I still think about both my deceased uncle and the one uncle that remains on my dad's side of the family. In fact I've thought of writing blog posts to him as if I were emailing him. No, I wouldn't gravel in the pain I feel about his separation from me. I'd write things I'd tell him or ask him about. We have had some good chats (literally, via Facebook Messenger). 

Recently, I've finished my grades for the semester. I've been more meticulous about this than any other time and as a result, I'm behind on preparing for my winter semester class which starts next Monday. That gives me the weekend to work that out. 

I'm meeting some friends at IKEA over the weekend so that will take away some of my preparation time. I'm not sure how it'll work out. These are friends from God's Will Haneul Church, which we used to attend. We left because we had some problems with the leader of our cell group. We were involved for some time but had some differences mostly related to me trying to help him with his English company that never quite got off the ground and then that led to putting all of our cards on the proverbial table about dissatisfaction about the cell group. But the reality was it was a meaningful time for both my wife and I. 

I guess that brings me to the end of my procrastination for now. Off I go to prepare the PowerPoint to introduce my new class to students. We're using World English which is a relatively new series. We'll see how it goes. I've been doing this kind of work now for 16 years. I started at Korea Nazarene University (Scroll to the bottom to find the link to the English page). Now I'm at Myongji University Science Campus, where I've been since 2012.

Alas, I digress. See you next time.